We do have fun with kink here in BC and it would be my pleasure to share our special hospitality with anyone that would like to visit!

Thank you for such a lovely and enjoyable interview. I can’t pass up an opportunity to talk about TCO, it is a passion of mine!

You both ROCK!

Can’t wait to see you both in….7 weeks!!

Thanks!
Dan

Warm regards,
Dan

risha

What a lovely episode and thank you for mentioning us again. Just to let you know. I still have my blog in English. It has not been updated in a looooong time. Now you gave me a reason to blog in English again.

Love
BM

I am honored to have met you and look forward to seeing you both next year.

You both are such a delight.

Nick

It was fantastic to see and spend more time with both of you this past weekend in Ft. Lauderdale, Florida! What an added bonus to meet at the pool in our ‘vanilla mode’ and get a laugh out of barely recognizing each other.

I would like to take a moment to commend both of you for the tireless and selfless work you do for our Community. As Master Z has dubbed those of us in this age group, this ‘Middle Guard Leather Woman’ salutes both of you. It is truly an honor to be your friends and we look forward to spending more time together in the future. Please let us know if there is any way we can assist you in your endeavors, especially with this fantastic venue, “Erotic Awakening.”

Again, thank you! In Leather ~Gypsie~ SouthEast slave 2010
Producer – Leather History Conference 2011

You go to OhayoCon (pronounced like the state)? It’s right in Columbus. Hentai film festival room Saturday night. Just realize that there’s usually a line up for such events.

Hugs kyria

Dan

I also want to say Your Podcast is one of my favorite on sexuality, because it is done in a down-to-earth way. You don’t present yourselves as some holier than thou way, where one would say This is the only way to do something when there is an infinite way to do the same thing. Thank you!

Your servant,
pupstudly

If anyone out there in Podcast Land has any comments or questions, they can feel free to contact me at marykay.sexeducator at gmail.

NeophobiA

The only thing that I’m wondering about is that it may be putting too much pressure on Dawn to try to get her to squirt in a week. It’s a very different kind of orgasm and for most women I think it takes a number of sessions before she will feel comfortable letting herself go to the extent where she can squirt. That’s a lot of surrender!

I taught my wife to squirt using Tallulah’s technique but we had to overcome years and years of her conditioning herself to “hold it in”. It took us months of playing and learning together, which by itself was very enjoyable because I was not pushing her… I was simply enjoying giving her orgasms, but also taking her a little farther each time. I’d say take it slowly and make it totally safe for her. For a lot of women their g-spots need to learn to expand into the new sensations and it can take 10 or 20 sessions (or more) before they are ready to surrender to the g-spot massage techniques.

Have fun – looking forward to the progress reports!

Thanks again!

As it happens, a new group of Level 1 will be kicked off in a few months. Keep your eyes peeled…

I’m interested in more info on the Qadishti certifacation classes you offer. I noticed the post I’m looking at talks of a Feb 2009 class, so it seems a bit out dated. I suppose a reply would show that activity in the area still exists

I am interested in the Education Meeting and play party in Columbus on November 8th. I was introduced to Qadishti about a year ago and have come across it a few times since then. I am an energy worker and Yoga Instructor and feel I need to get in depth with this healing Modality for myself and others…

Any additional info on the event would be appreciated.

Bryan

(hugs)
Cheryl

Great podcast

BM

As is often the problem with interviewing one person as a representative of a whole lifestyle group, Eric’s perceptions and opinions of swing clubs and house parties are not necessarily representative of the group as a whole. I have actually been to a swing party at his house before and I frequent several swing clubs in Indiana. Unlike his description of swing clubs, my experiences with swing clubs has been overwhelmingly positive and fun. I am a plus size woman who is heavily involved in the BDSM community (which is what I consider to be my primarily lifestyle choice) and I also swing for fun with my preference being swing clubs. I have not experienced finding the “Ken and Barbie” types as the majority of those at swing clubs, nor have I found house parties to be places where you are less likely to find alcohol consumed. As someone who doesn’t drink or use drugs, I share many of the same feelings about alcohol that Dawn was mentioning during the podcast. I have found that people use alcohol to loosen up in all sorts of swinger environments and even in many BDSM environments that I have experienced (maybe it’s an unfortunate side effect of living in such a conservative state here in Indiana – people need to drink to get past a lifetime of puritanical beliefs *smile*).

My personal preference is to go to swing clubs over house parties. Much like going to BDSM play parties organized by groups or weekend events as compared to going to private BDSM play parties at someone’s house, the organized, “public” BDSM parties and the “public” swing clubs tend to be more consistent with their rules and expectations in my experience. House parties in either lifestyle can vary widely based on how the host(s) like to do things. I’ve also found that if a host is a drama queen, their parties are going to be filled with drama, which is not my cup of tea. If there’s a drama queen at a public BDSM play party or a swing club, everyone else can usually just ignore them and have a good time anyway However, with the right host who has the right house for a party of either sort and the skill to put together a good guest list, house parties (swinging or bdsm play or even a mix of the two) can be a lot of fun. And one thing that Eric was accurate about is that it’s usually cheaper to go to someone’s house as opposed to a club. But you usually get more at a club than at a house because that money goes into having facilities that are set up for what you are going to be doing – bigger play spaces, more play spaces, more variety in types of play spaces, clean linens for changing the bedsheets after using them, etc – both at BDSM play parties and in the swinger world. So, it’s really just a matter of preference.

You always find people who think their way of doing any given lifestyle is better than the way others choose to have fun. It exists in the BDSM community and it exists in the swinging community. I’m just a bit disappointed that your interview on this topic came across that way. There can be a bit of tension between the BDSM folks and the swinger folks already, and putting someone who paints swing clubs in such an undesirable light for your podcast is very unfortunate.

Much like the purpose many groups/clubs serve in the BDSM world, a lot of swingers find swing clubs to be a fun place to hang out and develop friendships over time. Much like Eric was mentioning about the core group that attends his house parties, you find a similar phenomenon happening at the clubs and people develop great friendships at the clubs. There are many people who go to the clubs and only end up playing with their own partner, their close friends, or even not playing at all. It can become about developing a sense of community and just getting the chance to hang out and talk with your friends in a swinger lifestyle environment. As someone who personally identifies far more with the kink lifestyle than the swinger lifestyle, I have experienced the exact same phenomenon within the BDSM world and have often been to play parties where I have such a great time talking with friends that I never get around to scening. Many of the people I know from the swinger community who identify with the swinger lifestyle
have similar experiences at the clubs. And like with anything, the first time you show up, you aren’t necessarily going to be aware of these relationships or perhaps you won’t be immediately included in the group. In helping organize BDSM events in Indianapolis, I have heard more times than I can count that newcomers were annoyed by what seemed to be ‘cliquish” behavior. The first time you show up anywhere, you don’t have those established relationships and you may well never be back again, so while people are generally friendly, they’re also there to hang out with their friends and have conversations that catch up on each other’s lives. If you come back often enough, you’re going to develop those relationships, too and
you’ll suddenly find yourself part of the “clique” and having a great time. That’s how it works pretty much everywhere.

As a side comment to your discussion of your personal swinging experiences, there’s no “swinger failure” if you aren’t into having sex marathons with strangers at swinger clubs/parties. You will find a wide spectrum of people in the world of swinging from those who don’t feel they’ve had a good time if they aren’t in an orgy to those who primarily go to have sex with their own partner in the more public setting of a club rather than their own bedroom at home. All of it is fine and welcome. Just like in the BDSM world, you find poeple whose play is primarily sensation and light floggings to people who haven’t had fun if they aren’t setting people on fire or drawing blood and all of that is fine in our community, too.

My primary purpose for posting this comment is to offer a different perspective from someone who has participated in swinging for several years fairly regularly and to point out that one person is never really a good representation of an entire group. I hope that your listeners don’t walk away from this postcast with a negative view of swing clubs due to one person’s narration of their experiences.

The ONLY thing I was disappointed about this podcast, was that I wasn’t on podcast # 69!!! LOLOLO Oh well, 68, and I’ll owe you one!

Good swingin’,
Eric

Warmly,
Dan

To clarify, Ms Swap Fu and I do have a few (very few) rules, but they are more based on consideration for each other’s feelings. Mostly, we play together by preference, we check in with each other, and mostly we make sure we’re having fun and being safe.

One small quibble: You mentioned that we “brought in a woman, brought in another woman, got drunk and had sex”. As I recall, in Episode 9, we talked about several things, but that wasn’t one of them. We discussed the difficulties of using harness-type strap-ons after you’ve been drinking and also how it can sometimes be a challenge getting everyone to play before everyone is too tired or drunk to play. Maybe that’s what you were refering to.

I can tell by your podcast and by looking at your website that alcohol consumption is a concern and having participated some in the local BDSM community, I agree with you. Alcohol has no place in BDSM activites. Even in swinging, excessive drinking can be a problem. It has been for me; I’ve used it as a crutch in the past to get over social anxiety. I’ve since seriously cut back, and I’m a better man for it.

While we are both sex-positive segments of the population, we must be mindful that swinging and BDSM are very different lifestyles. In my decidely naive view of things, BDSM is all about attaining heightened levels of sexual energy through power exchanges. Swingers couples in general engage in the lifestyle as equals. While there may be light BDSM, typically, it is short lived and will consist of playful paddling or very basic bondage. The operative word is “Sharing”. It’s basically clubbing, with sexual play thrown into the mix.

I absolutely welcome your feedback and please continue to listen. I think you will find our last episode particularly interesting. I hope you make it a swinger party soon; I think you will have a lot of fun!

Mr Sawp Fu

However, what’s it *really* mean?

Celebration, yes. SERVICE, absolutely.

There is no “u” after Q until the very end of Qadishtu.

Looking forward to getting to know this site better and know the community better.

Just listened to the podcast, and loved all the talk about fireplay! Food for thought…..

Just one small point- I very much appreciate the Frolicon mention, but honesty requires that I mention that I’m only helping to run the LARP, not doing it myself.

Thanks,
Amanda