2 Styles of Power Exchange Relationships

There are many different styles of Power Exchange Relationships. 


2 of the styles we talk about in ‘Hearts and Collars’ is Co-op and Military. Various other names can be used for these styles, but these are the ones we are using in the book. 

These are the 2 styles we see the most…

Co-op is where everything is discussed and then the Leader makes a decision. There is rarely, if any, punishment in the dynamic. Those that follow this style, I’ve never heard them tell their follower anything along the lines of ‘I don’t want to hear your opinion’. 

Then there is the military style. It’s not really military but emulates that style. For the most parts, decisions aren’t discussed. The Leader makes a decision and tells the follower what to do. It’s possible that language such as, ‘I don’t need your opinion’ might be used. Punishment is more likely in this style. There are rituals and protocols involved. 

For Dan and I, ours is a combination. Sometimes he wants my opinion and we discuss decisions. Though he still makes the final decision unless he’s given the project to me to complete. So there is definitely co-op in our style. But, there is also military style mixed in. We have a punishment dynamic. And there are times that he doesn’t want my opinion or offer of information and will let me know to be quiet.





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